Clinton & the Pope (PG)      

      Clinton and the Pope died on the same day, due to some administrative
 foul up, Clinton gets sent to heaven and the Pope gets sent to hell. The
 Pope explains the situation to the hell administration, they check their
 paperwork, and the error is acknowledged.  They explain, however, that
 it will take about 24 hours to make the switch.
      The next day, the Pope is called in and the hell administration bids
 him farewell and he heads for heaven.  On the way up, he meets Clinton on
 the way down, and they stop to chat.

 Pope:  Sorry about the mix up.
 Clinton:  No problem.
 Pope:  Well, I'm really excited about going to heaven.
 Clinton:  Why's that?
 Pope:  All my life I've wanted to meet the Virgin Mary.
 Clinton: You're a day late.

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APPLICATION FOR WHITE HOUSE INTERNSHIP 
                    - Submitted by John Boyance
                ---------------------------------------- 
Greetings prospective White House interns!

Fill out this information form and send it back to 
the White House at president@whitehouse.gov

Name:
Hometown:
Sex: F__ Age:
Measurements: (required for medical purposes) 
How many beers it takes to get you...
 ...Giggly:
 ...Drunk:
 ...Hot:
 ...To lie to a federal prosecutor: 

Quick quiz:

You've always considered the White House: 
a)      a monument to democracy
b)      the place where great leaders meet 
c)      vaguely erotic
d)      extremely erotic

Hillary Clinton is a(n):
a)      model wife and mother
b)      icon of late 20th century femininity 
c)      an obstacle
d)      inappropriate companion for the leader of the free world 

You've always wanted to know more about the President's: 
a)     MidEast policies
b)     childhood in Hope, Ark
c)     romper room
d)     "monument to democracy"

My social life as an intern would likely consist of: 
a)      hitting Georgetown bars with the other interns 
b)      reading, study
c)      late nights working at the White House 
d)      late nights working the White House

Score 1 point for each a, 2 for each b, 3 for each c, 4 for each d. 
Scores of 16 can start tomorrow.  Scores of 12 and above, please
call soon.

     Uncle Sam (and Uncle Bill) wants you. 

*Please feel free to forward this form to anyone you  know who might
 be interested in this program.  The White House is an equal 
 opportunity abuser.