Top Ten Signs Your Satmar Teen Is In Trouble
 
10. Sometimes stays in bed till after 6am.
9. In his sock drawer, you find pictures of women in short sleeve blouses
8. Shows up at a simcha in full "Kiss" makeup. 
7. When you criticize him, he yells, "Dee sucks!" 
6. His name is Menachem, but he goes by "Men Daddy."
5. Defiantly says, "If I had a radio, I'd listen to rap!" 
4. You come upon his secret stash of colorful socks. 
3. Uses slang expression: "Talk to the hand, cause the beard ain't 
listening."
2. Was recently seen on a Friday afternoon walking under 20 miles an hour.

..and the number one sign your Satmar teen is in trouble...
1. He's wearing his big black hat backwards!