What did the Jewish Mother ask her daughter
   when she told her she had an affair?
   "Who catered it?"
  
   What kind of cigarettes do Jewish Mothers smoke?
   Gefiltered.
  
   What is the most common disease transmitted
   by Jewish Mothers?
   Guilt
  
   Why do Jewish Mothers make great parole
   officers?
   They never let anyone finish a sentence.
  
   Why are Jewish Mothers always excused from
   jury duty?
   They all insist that they're the guilty ones.
  
   Why are there so few Jewish Mothers who are
   alcoholics ?
   Because alcohol dulls the pain.
  
   What is a genius?
   An average student with a Jewish Mother.
  
   What's the difference between a Jewish
   Mother and a vulture?
   A vulture waits until you're dead to eat your
   heart out."