Be a Kosher Millionaire

You have three lifelines to help you, as follows:

1. You may call your Rabbi for his opinion.
2. You may ask your congregation for their opinion.
3. You may consider your spouse's opinion...or not.
4. Bonus lifeline! Your Mother will give you her opinion, 
whether you ask for it or not.

Lets play: So you wouldn't mind being a Kosher Millionaire.

For $500
Q. Who is Israel's favorite Internet provider?
A. NetanYahoo.

For $1,000
Q. What is the name of a facial lotion made for Jewish women?
A. Oil of Oy Vey.

For $2,000
Q. What is the title of the new horror film for Jewish women?
A. Debbie Does Dishes.

For $4,000
Q. What is the technical term for a divorced Jewish Woman?
A. The "Plaintiff."

For $8,000
Q. How does a Jewish kid verbally abuse his playmates?
A. "Your Mother pays retail."

For $16,000
Q. In the Jewish doctrine, when does the fetus become human?
A. When it graduates from medical school.

For $32,000
Q. What does a Jewish women do to keep her hands soft and her nails long
and beautiful?
A. Nothing, she does nothing at all.

For $64,000
Q. Define "Genius".
A. A "C" student with a Jewish mother.

For $125,000
Q. What do you call a bloodthirsty Jew on a rampage?
A. Genghis Cohen.

For $250,000
Q. Why did the Moyel retire?
A. He just couldn't cut it anymore.

For $500,000
Q. If Tarzan and Jane where Jewish, what would Cheetah be.
A. A fur coat.

For $1,000,000
Q. What is the difference between a Jewish Grandmother and 
an Italian Grandmother?
A. 10 lbs.